Today started out fine. Went to the bank, went to work. You know. The usual. Me and Mom shared a "whopper with cheese". She still hasn't gotten the concept of sharing, actually, but I'm working on it. Three bites for her and one for me doesn't cut it. And I only get meat and cheese. No bun or lettuce or tomato. Oh well.
Then, we went to see Miss Cathleen. I must have done something right because I got TWO paw massages and a couple of belly rubs with that nifty smelling lotion. I'm feeling rather at home at Miss Cathleen's these days. Such a life.
We come home, I go out. I have dinner, then go out. In...out. You know how it goes. So the last "out" before bedtime I was having a nice time hunting for old dropped and squished plums under the Mariposa plum tree. Then I hear "Come to bed, Mary-Margaret". Oh yeah, sure..in a minute. "MARY-MARGARET...you get IN HERE RIGHT NOW!". Uh huh!. I will...just a sec, I say. Then she says "IF YOU'RE NOT IN HERE RIGHT NOW I'M CUTTING OFF YOUR ALLOWANCE!!"
Well, darned if I want something else chopped off. I drop my plum and race into the house. You know, I had most of my tail detached in my infancy ("docked", they said). I had my delicate feminine parts removed in a "little surgery", and four baby teeth pulled. The last thing I want to lose is another...anoth..a...whaaat?? So, in mortal fear, I leap through my doggie door and, as Mom's shutting the glass slider, I start thinking. Hey, wait just a cotton pickin' minute here. I don't HAVE an allowance that I'm aware of, and if I do, I don't know where it is. Idle threats, the way I see it. Allowance, indeed.
Hmmph! See if THAT one works again. Can't cut off what one doesn't have.
G'night everybody.
Love, Mary-Margaret
PS (added 8/22/06): Mom says I have to be totally honest if I'm keeping a diary. What I didn't mention is that the time before I went out before the last time? She did the "allowance" thing and I fell for it then, too. I was just too embarrassed to tell you, because I don't like to feel stupid and I don't want all my friends to laugh at me. But the absolute truth is I fell for it TWICE in one night. I'm sooooo ashamed. mmo'b
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2 comments:
Poor Mary Margaret,
You simply haven't trained your mom well enough now. Now with all these threats to cut off your allowance, perhaps you should start demanding one so that you have one to be cut off.
Or next time, bring the squishy plum with you. That'll show her.
Shannon
It must have been late and maybe you were tired. Or maybe, cuz you're a terrier like me, you have a short attention span.
Bussie Kissies
Buster
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