Dear GrandPapa....

I'm on a business trip. A conference, if you will. MEEEEE! Mary-Margaret O'Brien. When I found out Mom was going and she was going to take meeeee because I am FOUR and I'm old enough now, I was everly so excited.

Today, we were downstairs listening to people talk. I dozed a bit between taking notes...well, actually, taking notes was pretty hard to do without opposable thumbs, so I was remembering until I fell asleep. Then we had some lunch, and I got to go out a few times. So many smells...so little time.

This afternoon there was a panel of four speakers - One bankruptcy judge and three attorneys. Mom was really into it but I zonked out. After their presentation Mom started explaining that sometimes I snore pretty loud and she hoped it didn't bother any one. Oh, HOW EMBARRASSING! They HEARD me maybe three rows away, and they thought it was my MOTHER. She took it all right, but I blushed a lot.

Then for supper I got to pick what I wanted off the menu. We had FIVE choices: Grilled lemon chicken breast, char-grilled new york sirloin (with rosemary sofritto) , broiled green tea lacquered salmon, shiitake essence, stir fried brown rice with sunny side organic egg (blegh!) and stone fired pizza. I picked STEAK. (Hey, I'm not paying for it!). It was dee-lish!

Tonight I'm all full of energy and messing with Mom's laundry. This is the life. I could get used to it. Room service is the best ever.

Love and kisses....

Mary-Margaret

What the bank said!

We got a call from the bank this morning. Here's how it was explained to my mom:

When the teller closed out her work two days ago she had a couple of extra checks. She made up another deposit slip and put the $650.00 into our account. (Nobody likes loose checks floating around, right?) So what we want to know is....if she fixed what she thought was a problem on the same day, how come they only took out the money and didn't put it back in?

Here's what we think of that "explanation" - (click here)

Love, Mary-Margaret

PS - We get our $4.00 back that they charged us for correcting OUR mistake (HAH!). Mom said they ought to give us back another $4.00 that we are charging them for THEIR mistake. You want to know what they said? Hmmmmmm? Click on the "click here" link again.

Counting on my fingerettes....

One...two...three...four! That's how many checks we had in our bank deposit yesterday afternoon. Today, the bank said we were missing two checks and they took $650.00 out of our account AND charged us $4.00 for doing so. "Um...." (I said)"....four is two times as many as two." I think someone would notice at the time we gave our money to the bank if we were missing something. Two checks is half as thick as four checks. No point in even going to the bank for two checks.

Oh well. My very good friends who work there are going to find the problem and give us back our money. And if they don't we can always get the people who wrote us the checks to give us new ones, in a month or so, if they don't get their checks back. Still....$650.00 is a lot of money, dontcha think? That buys a LOT of duck jerky, to my way of thinking.

Other than the bank losing $650.00 of our money, things are going well. And I got to see my very good friend Gina today. She's my personal banker, you know.

Love,

Mary-Margaret

RIP Bill Graham

Dear Grandpapa - I got this message from RAND today. I think maybe you know him because he was at RAND the same time you were. I'm very sorry that he passed away.

A memorial service for William 'Bill' Graham will be held at RAND in Santa Monica on Sat, November 14th, from 11AM to 1PM.

Bill passed away on October 4th. He worked at RAND as head of the Electronics and Engineering Departments, among other positions, from 1950 to 1982 and as a consultant from 1982 to 1995. His research on defense weapon systems and remotely piloted air vehicles was widely praised by fellow experts, and he spent two tours studying U.S. operations in South Vietnam. He was also a former Navy radar technical officer.

Let me and Mom know if you want to go to the service.

I love you, GrandPapa

Mary-Margaret

Twick or Tweet

One for the money...........



Two for the show.............



Three to get ready but I'm too tired to go!

Hope you all have a Happy Halloween!

Love,

Mary-Margaret

If it's on the floor, it's MINE!

One of our clients brought in a stack of 23 papers to be served. She also brought an envelope addressed to my mom with a check in it. Somehow (Oh, lucky me!) the envelope landed on the floor and it just sat there, calling my name. Thinking this might be another Halloween greeting, I decided to open it. Hey! It's not like anyone was paying attention to me. I shredded it open and saw there was something in it and walked away. That's just the kind of pup I am, you know? You'd think "some people" would appreciate my consideration, but NOOOOOOO!

"AAAAAAAAAAACK", she yells. "Mary-Margaret, you get over here and clean up your mess!", she says. "As if....!", I replied and sat down next to one of my favorite clients' shoe (he was wearing it, by the way). Uh oh....she looks mad. I stand up as high as I can and I'm begging Mr. "H" to PULEEEZE pick me up. He laughs at me, but I end up on his lap, safe for the moment.

Well, how was I to know there was a check in there if I didn't open it? Hmmmmm??? And I only tore off a teensy little corner of it, sort of by the check number, so I'm sure it's still good, right? RIGHT?

Rule #2: If it's on the floor, it's MINE!!

Hmmmmph! Maybe she'll learn her lesson this time.

Mary-Margaret

GID OWTA DA WAY STUBASKET

"Gid owta da way stubasket!"

Sheesh....My mom has a meatball sandwich for lunch and all of a sudden she speaks another language. "Gid owta da way stubasket", she says. Over and over. Like I'm supposed to know what that means? Hmmmmm?

Meanwhile, until I figure it out, there's some trash in a container under her desk that tastes absolutely heavenly! YUM!

(The melted provolone just makes it, you know?)

Later, gator!

Mary-Margaret

OH...and PS! I got a HALLOWEEN card from my very good friends in Brighton, New York today. We were downstairs when Cella (the mail lady) came by. We sat patiently on the steps that go no where (like the Winchester mansion only there's just three of them that end at a solid wall) and Cella started laughing. She kept looking at me and I said "What's so funny?". She brought me over a really kewl orange envelope addressed to MEEEEEEEEEE, Mary-Margaret O'Brien. It tastes just like my friends AbbeyMia, Harper and Piper from New York. I never ever in my whole like got a Halloween card before. Between the trash and the mail lady, this has gotta be one of my best days ever.

Mary-Margaret O'Boleyn

Argh. I can totally relate to Ann Boleyn's last few moments when she had to walk herself to the chopping block.

"Bath time!", I hear. Oh crud. I look for someplace to hide but I'm not fast enough. "Oh, THERE you are!", she says. "Bath time!". I sit firmly planted on the stairway landing.

"YOU MARCH!", she orders. I hang my head and skootch up the stairs, one at a time. So this is how it feels to have to take yourself to your doom. I am not a willing participant here, but I must obey my ruler.

My collar is removed and I am totally naked. The water is turned on and I say a few final prayers before being immersed and soaped. May I emerge from this torture clean, dry and brushed. And, Dear Lord, please let me have a GOOD hair day.

Amen

Your humble servant...

Mary-Margaret

Thank you, TERESA and DOGGY DAY SPA!

I got a box from Teresa Brendemuehl of Doggy Day Spa in Kerkhoven, MN and I can open it MYSELF!! I don't need any help. I am FOUR!!

This is what she sent me. My very own terry cloth bathrobe with a yellow ducky on the back.....a pink stuffie....a magnetic calendar....perfume (which will come in handy and I will keep at the office for when one of my co-workers - she knows who she is - informs me that I stink)....and PEPPERONI PUPPY-POPCORN. I just LOVE people pop corn and I can't wait for Mom to pop this in the microwave for me.




My Cousin Sophie says Teresa is the very best personal puppy stylist in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD. I don't know about that as I'm pretty partial to my own Miss Marilyn, but I can honestly say that Teresa knows how to make a Pup's day.

Thank you, TERESA!!

I love you.



Did you know us pups get in-som-ni-a too? Gosh...last night I woke up about 2:30AM and started pacing. I jumped up and down on the bed for a while. I went over to Mom and got right up in her face and started heavy-breathing. "Get up", I said. "I want to PLAAAAY!".

"Arrgggh", she said, and told me to get back in bed. But that wasn't my plan. I attacked her hand a few times until she swatted me away. So then I got down and stood by the door, "ruurrrfffing" at her. "Whaaa....whaaaa....?", she asked. "Well, NOTHING!", I said. I just want some attention. "Mmmmmmmfffff", she replied, and stuffed her face back into her pillow.

I got back on the bed and talked her into giving me some belly rubs until she fell asleep. Then I got back on my pillow and went back to sleep, too. Humans are sooooooo chronologically oriented. Everything has to be done "on time". Pups aren't like that. We play when we FEEL like playing, even when it's dark outside. Life would be everly less complicated if humans would toss all their watches and clocks, don't you think?

Mary-Margaret

Happy Columbus Day!

The way I see it, some directionally challenged human sails from Spain, gets lost, loses a few ships in a nasty storm, and beaches himself on an island that he's never seen before. The locals gather about to possibly try to help him and he gives them smallpox. But don't mind me. I'm just a pup who tends to see things in black and white.

My Aunt Rose's (rest her soul) Uncle Joe and Aunt Susie dropped by to say "Hello" with their two remaining kids, Daisy and Coco. Daisy is a Shih Tsu and just the nicest pup I've ever met. Coco Puff was my Aunt Rose's boyfriend. He's 16 years old now. He even once brought Rosie a piece of chicken and dropped it right in front of her, he was so in love with her.

Joe and Susie used to work with Mom until they upped and moved to Colorado. They're on vacation right now for two whole weeks, so they came to California to visit friends and to mine their claims (whatever that means).

Then Mom got a flu shot and she's been reading since she got home. I've been sitting at the front window watching everyone and everything that passes by, woofing at stuff that catches my interest. It's been a nice, restful vacation.

We're charging up the camera battery so I can finish opening my present from Theresa in Kerkhoven, MN. I'm not supposed to open anything unless it's on camera so I can share the joy with all my friends. (rolling eyes)

Hope you all had a fun filled holiday, too.

Love,

Mary-Margaret

The Ins and Outs of it all

Taking what I discovered about my mom yesterday (which is that she can't see her feet without bending over - therefore, I am invisible if I want to be) and applying it to other circumstances, I've discovered other things I can do for entertainment.

For example, we come back from being "out" and I trot right along side of her ankle all the way to our office. "Good girl", she says. Then she opens the door and she goes in thinking I'm right there. Except I put on the brakes and take a step backwards. She goes in and I am FREE FREE FREE AT LAST. Whooo hooo!

I can run up and down the hallways as fast as I want - wheeeeee! I can sneak up to other office doors and listen to people talking. My very good friend Zeus (the Weimaraner) works next to us so sometimes I go and sniff around the bottom of his door. I can sit in the middle of the hallway and see who goes by outside our glass doors. If anyone went out to lunch and got "take-out", I can check for tasty morsels on the carpet.

Then I get bored. Today, I lasted maybe an hour before I said "Arf?". "Arf?", says Mom, and then she asks Shannon where I am. Hmmmmmm, they say after hunting all over. They open the door. I race inside all laughing and stuff. They give me some loving and hugs, and then they say "MARY-MARGARET! What are we going to DO with you?".

I tried it again a little later when Mom went to check out Zeus' dad because there was a loud "thunk" from his office and we got all worried about him. Turns out he just dropped a heavy-duty stapler. It gave me a chance to play in the hall again, but I got caught maybe 10 minutes later.

I figure I can keep this up until either Mom loses enough weight to see her toes (and me) OR I get put back on a leash. (OH GOSH NO...NOOOOOOOO...ANYTHING BUT THAT!)

Cheerfully yours,

Mary-Margaret

Yanking Mom's Chain....again!

What can I say? It's not like I do much at work. I greet people; make them feel comfortable. I take care of little kids when their parents bring them in. Piece of cake...but I need a real CHALLENGE. This is where I get to play with Mom's head.

I had a bit a gas today. So Shannon takes me out and I piddle a bit but nothing serious. She brings me back, and right away I gas Mom again really good. Yup. I get to go out again. This time I hunted for lizards before I had to go back. Shannon just glared at me.

When a client came in later and he and Mom were just winding up some business, I discretely let loose again. They BOTH fanned the air and said "Yuck". This time, Mom took me out. And she waited....and waited.....and waited.

"Oh, come ON, Mary-Margaret!", she complained. But I just checked the outside edges of the planter downstairs. I found an interesting twig that I stuck to my chest (like velcro). I found some really neat spider webs that I draped over my nose. There was something kind of putrid under the plants, so I rolled in that for a while. No lizards this time. Finally I was told to get back on the elevator.

"Fine", I said. And I rode up to the 3rd floor like I always do. Mom got off first (usually it's me first) while I dilly-dallied around because I found some kewl stuff to sniff. She walked all the way through the double doors before she realized I wasn't there.

"Mary-Margaret? Where ARE you?", she said. She hunted all over and finally (duh!) figured out I was still on the elevator. She pushed the button, and the door slid open. I was still sniffing around. She said, "You get OUT OF THERE right NOW!". I rolled my eyes at her and got off. She opened the double doors again and I quickly darted back on to the elevator just as the doors were shutting. (snicker snicker...I am fast and sneaky!)

"NOW where'd you go?", she wondered. It didn't take her long to figure out where I was this time. She punched the button, the doors slid open and I just sat there and gave her my most winning grin. This IS fun. I could do this all day. I don't think SHE could, though. This time she scooped me up and carried me all the way back to the office before she put me down.

Some people have no sense of adventure.

Love,

Mary-Margaret

What's a "Sewer Serve", Mom??

"A "Sewer Serve" is another way of saying that the process server didn't actually serve the paper as they were instructed to do, but just tossed it in the "sewer" (or garbage) and signed a "Declaration under penalty of perjury" or a sworn "Affidavit" that they DID serve the paper". (This is what my Mom said when I asked her. She ALWAYS tells me the truth, too!)

So I asked her how come somebody would DO that? And she says she has absolutely NO idea, since professional process servers are paid to either serve the document, or (if the people don't live there anymore) sign a Declaration/Affidavit of Non-Service. Either way the process servers have done their job. Professional companies like my employer, RASCAL, even get hired to find the person or figure out a way to tell the defendant that he's got a problem so he can defend himself. PROFESSIONAL Process Servers (like my Mom) would NEVER do a "sewer serve"!

So then I ask her how come the "FTC*" is having all these meetings about "Sewer Serves"? And "tens of thousands of people" have defaults entered against them and they don't even know they're being sued? And she says to click on the link above. She thinks a lot of these people just don't want to admit they messed up.

Somewhere in fairly recent times people just stopped taking responsibility for themselves and they learned to blame other people instead. Tsk. No wonder so many humans prefer the company of pups, I say. We're everly so less complicated.

Love and schlurpies....

Mary-Margaret

*Federal Trade Commission, not "Furry Terrier Club" (this time, anyway!)

Clocking in!

I've gotten a few reminders that there are people who actually READ my diary who say that I need to start writing again. Here's the thing! I have to dictate to my Mom, who then has to transcribe Caninidian (or Puplish) into English and then put it on to the computer, which then goes into my blog. She has to be in just such a mood to do so and lately she's been a little distracted.

There are fewer consonents in my language due to the rigid formation of my mouth and lips. So if I try to say something like "Tuna Fish Sandwich", it comes out like "Turr-a-wit Tand-it" (sort of). "Cat" is "Owrrr"; "Out" is "Aurrr". And "Take dictation NOW" is "rrurrr-a-rowr-rrr-RRROW!!" A low throaty growl - "hrurrr hrurrr" can mean a lot of things, including "Have you noticed that the slider is closed and I haven't been out for..oh...let's see...maybe FOUR HOURS??"

We communicate pretty well, but there is room for improvement. At the moment, we're at the office and "The Mother Person" is doing reports. My plan is to sleep until it's time to go home for dinner.

Love you guys...

Mary-Margaret

PS: When I got home tonight I was shooing off cats. Except one cat just sat there and STARED at me. Mom finally got off her duff and came to the window. Whoa...she says, "THAT'S JUST A BABY KITTY, MARY-MARGARET! YOU STOP SCARING THAT BABY!". Oh, like she might like me to have a kitty of my own, maybe? I don't theeeeenk so. But, I have to admit, it was kinda cute the way it kept looking at me. It was grey with a white face and white paws and maybe about 2 pounds worth of kitty...maybe if even that. Note to myself - remind Mom she's allergic to cats.

Powered by Gas!

Or maybe I should say "EMPOWERED" by Gas. I am FOUR - Hear me ROAR!!

It's amazing how the little things in life one discovers that gives them a feeling of superiority. Take "GAS", for example. It's one thing to know about it, and another to take control. For a long time when I was a little kid and I wanted to go to out, I'd scratch at the carpet, then on Mom's legs...and then I start talking non-stop so she couldn't hear her TV program and then she'd say, "Oh? You want to go to out?".

Now that I have the wisdom that comes along with being FOUR, I don't scratch...I don't paw! I don't even have to say a word. Nope! I very quietly hop onto the back of Mom's chair, position my body so my head is at the edge and my tail is in the middle..maybe about 6" from her nose. Then...slowly, silently....(OH I CAN'T STAND MYSELF...HEHEHEHEHEHEH! I AM BAAAAD to the BONE!)...I leak a little post-supper gas.

She goes "EEEEYEEEEW...OH, YOU STINK...ICK...UGH...HOW COULD YOU?" and then she sits up and fans the air. In a little bit, she takes a cautious, tentative sniff again and "OHHHH....GAWD....YOU ABSOLUTELY REEK!!" I'm doing the best I can to keep a straight face, here. This procedure usually gets the back door opened and, as I race for freedom, she calls out, "Make it snappy!". I'm pretty quick about it. Honestly, I might not really have to go out at all, but it's the IDEA of POWER that floats my boat. I HAVE THE POWER TO GET THE BACK DOOR OPEN! I like this very much!

Sometimes, just for fun because I like to yank her chain, I save up a little and let loose on the bed just as she starts to doze off. Yup! That gets her wide eyed and ready to rumble all over again.

I wonder what else I can do? Hmmmmmmmmmmmm??

Love, Mary-Margaret

An Argument Against Electronic Service of Process

An Argument Against Electronic Service of Process

The American people have specific rights afforded to them that are taken for granted. The right to "Due Process of Law" is one of them. As technological advances are made providing transmission of information electronically, do we - The American Pupple...um..PEOPLE - stand to lose our Constitutionally guaranteed rights?

Read the Argument Against Electronic Service of Process. Have we come full circle? Will we be subject to judgment without notification? Will we be found guilty until proven innocent?

Read and decide!

Mary-Margaret "The Bloggy Doggy" O'Brien

(published as a courtesy to my mother, Michele Dawn, otherwise known as "The Princess of Process")

Smarty Pants!!

From Michele, Mary-Margaret's mom:

Last night we were all ready for bed, doors locked and lights out, or so I thought. Mary-Margaret wasn't in any of her usual spots, and she wasn't in bed. The last thing I remembered doing is putting the laundry into the dryer. Could I have left her in the garage? Nope...not there. After looking absolutely everywhere for her, calling and calling, and then listening without response for the little tinkling sound her tags make, I thought the unthinkable. [gasp!] Could I have left her outside in the dark?

What kind of mother am I that I have lost my puppy, and maybe even shut her out doors and left her prey to owls, hawks and coyotes? At the exact moment that I thrust open the glass slider door, my sneaky little smarty-pants darted out from under the kitchen table and dove out her little personal doggy door. "Woo hoooooo!", I heard her say as she raced around the perimeter of our property. I swear I heard her gloating to the neighborhood cats at her cleverness.

Next time, I will look under the kitchen table before I fall for that trick again. She knows that the last place I look for her is in the back-yard, and she totally used that to her advantage.

What a little devil! Yorkies are so terribly smart......and sneaky!!

Happy BIRFDAY to MEEEE!!!

Yup. Finally. I am FOUR YEARS OLD. That's my Aunt Debbie holding me.

This time four years ago I was in Missouri all snuggled in with my brothers and sisters and probably nestled up against my birth mother having some lunch. I wasn't there very long, though. Some human yanked me away from my family, sent me to California where I had some surgery on an inguinal hernia, then I got some shots and was tossed into a glass box in a pet store in Temecula, CA. All this before I was even NINE WEEKS OLD, too. Lucky me that my REAL MOM walked in and adopted me. I don't think much about those cold and lonely days anymore. Just maybe on my birthday, I send my fur mom a little love from my heart.

For my birthday I donated my present money to Yorkshire Terrier National Rescue, Inc. at www.ytnr.com to help other kids like me who weren't as lucky to be adopted by a loving family.

We share my birthday at work with people who have businesses there. They all know me and they drop by to have some cake with me. (FYI, I don't get frosting ...just some hunks of cake without any extras, but that's my favorite anyway!)



This is me opening my present from my friends in New York. I got some more cards, too.

After work we went to Bank of America where everybody there wished me a Happy Birthday. Then we went to California Bank and Trust, and we took them all my left-over cake. I just love those ladies and I wanted to do something nice for them. OH SURPRISE! They had a present for me. Another tiny bag of duck jerky and a pink flower barrette with some mint green ribbon leaves on it.

My very good friend, Gina (who is also my personal banker), cut me up some pieces of duck jerky and EVERYBODY said "Happy Birthday". When we got home, Mom accidentally dropped a whole big piece of duck jerky which I grabbed and enjoyed while I was hiding under the kitchen table. See, I'm not allowed to have BIG pieces of jerky...just tiny small ones...ever since I had one go down the wrong way and then horked it up on the teller's counter (along with some other stuff I'd swallowed earlier). But it's the BIG pieces I like best, so I hide when I'm lucky enough to find one.



(This is MY card from AbbeyMia, Harper and Piper! I'm putting it away someplace so I can sniff them anytime I want. Wow...the scent of them sure brings back some happy memories!!)


And the BEST for last! MY CAKE!!!!!




What a great birthday. Thank you to all my friends, and to my Mom especially, for loving me no matter what.

I hope everybody has a great day today!!


Love, Mary-Margaret

PS - Last night before I gave my mother heart failure (see 9/20 post) my mom put the telephone on speaker, and my GrandPapa played "Happy Birthday" to meeeee, his GrandPuppy. I sat very still, turning my ears to the telephone, so I wouldn't miss one single note. I wish Mom had gotten a recording for me. Maybe next time? I sure do love my GrandPapa.

"Pooky", my new neighbor! And "Rufey"!

Something exciting has happened. I have been talking through the fence to a really nice pup for the past couple of weeks. We've only been doing some preliminary "yapping", though, and hadn't gotten to the basics like names or gender or choice of flea deterrent. Yesterday morning we met! Finally, nose-to-nose, we gazed into each other's eyes and even touched noses.

His name is "Pooky" and he's half-chihuahua and half Basenji. Personally, I think he took after his mother since shape-wise he's about the size of my good friend, Jami Ramsey. His color is white with some cafe-au-lait markings and his nose is medium brown in color. He has nice teeth, and his tail curves in an upside-down question mark formation. Last night we each sat on our own side of the fence and "wurffed" quietly at each other until it was time for supper.

My kitty friend, the black cat with white markings, met me when I got home yesterday. She was waiting for me by the front door under the bush. Lately we've been playing tag. Personally, I don't think kitty leaping to the top of my 6-foot fence is fair, since I can barely make it to the couch cushions, but then I've heard cats don't play fair. Good thing I have a new neighbor, dontcha think?

Love,

Mary-Margaret "Welcome Wagon" O'Brien

PS: I made another new friend today. His name is Rufus, but he prefers to be called "Rufey". He's very nice. His mom is a client of ours, so I guess that makes Rufey a client, too. We shared some treats together. (and I REALLY need to get Mom a new camera. Her cell phone absolutely sucks, dontcha think?)



Rufey

Today is Frontline Day!

Woo hoo. I got "Frontlined" this morning. No fleas for me. Not being the kind of person to keep this good stuff all to myself I made sure I rubbed up really good against Mom's nice work outfit. (hee hee)

Frontline is a little oily so when someone looks at her blouse (chest?) a bit funny today, she just tells them that she's "flea free" for another month, thanks to MEEEEEEEE!!

I DO EVERLY SO LOVE TO SHARE!!

Mary-Margaret